I read this article titled "O, Alma Mater" and it got me thinking.....Before you read my thoughts, take a minute to read the article for yourself.

I have been asked before:  "When will you return to the workforce and use your Master's degree in Elementary Education again?"  It's like it is some sort of waste if I don't return back to work versus being a stay-at-home mama.

I would argue that I glean from my years in college on a weekly basis in my job as a stay-at-home mama.  I am thankful for the education I received and it certainly has not "gone to waste."  I learned a lot about myself during that time and what I liked and didn't like about public education.

Now, I've been a teacher's assistant, teacher, pre-school director, Ministry Assistant, substitute teacher and Family and Children's Director over the years before becoming a mama.  I enjoyed my jobs at the time and learned a lot at each one.  However, Papa Bear and I had dreamed that I would be able to stay home with our children, just as my mother did and Papa Bear's mother did.  It was something that was important to us.  We were so thankful that dream became a reality.


My last job was an interim position and it finished up shortly before Sweet Girl was born.  Since then, I have been a stay-at-home mama and wouldn't change it for anything in the world.  I've been asked over the years if I miss working.  I always say, "No, I don't miss working, but (for the most part!) I miss the people I worked with."  I was in charge at most of my jobs and dealt with so much drama, that I was looking forward to being away from it.  I've also been asked if I look forward to going "back to work" and my answer to that is usually, "If I never have a paid job again, I will be happy."  This response seems to surprise a lot of people.  I also tell them that while I may not be getting a paycheck, I am storing up riches in heaven--which is far better than any salary.  :)

It brings me to the conclusion that maybe people are confused.  Being a stay-at-home mama is not an easy road.  It is a job, a career and a very special one at that.  I am on duty 24-7 and there are no sick days.  I don't just sit at home and watch the girls play all day.  (Which, believe it or not, is what some people seem to believe.)  We are out and about, experiencing life and learning new things.  I should not have to defend my career choice.  Does a lawyer or an accountant or salesperson have to defend his/her career choice?  Probably not.

So, yes, I do have a Master's degree and I stay home with my children.  That was God's plan for me and I am loving it.  I am humbled that He has chosen me to be the mother to two special blessings, a wife to Papa Bear and that He has provided the resources through Papa Bear's jobs for me to stay home and take care of our family.

Disclaimer:  I am in no way putting down mothers who work outside of the home.  Those women have two full time jobs.  I give them a lot of credit!  

I also realize that there are fathers who also stay home.  I know that wouldn't work out for every man, but kudos to those of you who do it!

As long as parents are doing what they think is best for their family, that's what matters.  

Can you relate?  I'd love to hear what you thought about the article and my post.  Please share your comment below.


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9/10/2013 23:57:29

I worked many years outside the home too. I was a teacher in a Christian school in a special needs classroom where most of my kids were my students. I did it to not only help the ministry but to help my special needs kids get educated the way I wanted them to be. I preference is to stay at home, and now that we are empty nesters, am finding I like being home! I work here and there, but I sincerely desire to be here for my kids and grandkids when they need me. You have the right focus - be home for your family if you can and enjoy it!

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The Master's Daughter
9/18/2013 17:29:36

Thanks, Val! I hope you enjoy just being home and spending time with you family!

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9/11/2013 06:46:19

I can definitely relate. I used to be asked this all the time. I love staying home and homeschooling my girls and wouldn't trade it for anything. It has taken a lot of sacrifice, but I feel it is all worth it.

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9/11/2013 08:16:46

Great post, thank you.

I can relate to this. I used to be a City of London lawyer until I became a stay-at-home mum to two boys under three, and I don't regret my decision at all. I'm there to wipe their bums, to watch them grow, to console them when they need some love and kisses. Then maybe I will be ready to go back to work when they are at school.

People should just live and let live in my opinion! :-)

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The Master's Daughter
9/18/2013 17:37:57

Good for you, Leyla! Glad that you are so happy being home with your little ones. They grow so fast! Enjoy every second. :)

And I agree, what works for one family may not work for another.

The Master's Daughter
9/18/2013 17:31:55

Megan,

Isn't it funny how people assume they know what's best for others? I bet you got questions about homeschooling, too? You know what's best for you and your family. The end result is totally worth any and all sacrifices along the way!

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9/11/2013 08:50:31

I am a stay at home mama as well. I didn't go to college; I've only ever wanted to be a stay at home mama, like my mom is. I get a lot of questions though, like "are you always going to stay home", and "do you miss working". I think motherhood is the greatest, most important, most difficult career in the world!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:14:46

Good for you, Alix. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a stay at home mama! It is one of the most important jobs in the world. Sounds like you have your priorities in order!

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9/11/2013 09:30:55

Making the choice to stay home when you put all of that time into school can be a hard choice but, in the end your kids will not always be kids.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:16:15

Jennifer,

It may be a hard choice for some, but it was something I always wanted! So thankful that God has afforded me this opportunity. And like I mentioned in the post, what I learned in school is helping me with my new career. :)

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9/11/2013 10:09:05

I love this post! Prior to getting my my daughter, I always thought being a stay at home mom was such an easy job. How great would it be to just get to stay at home all day doing nothing. Well boy was I wrong! Its the hardest job. I have so much more respect for stay at home moms now. I dont think I could ever do it but I have a lot of respect for those that do!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:18:02

Remona,

Thanks! I don't know why so many people think SAHM do nothing all day. We do have another person (or more!) to take care of. Thank you for your kind words. I would say that it is not a job for everyone, but I'm sure glad it has worked out for me to do it!

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9/11/2013 10:09:25

Oh I can relate to this one big time. I also have a masters degree in education and I choose to stay home. I always wanted to be a SAHM and I don't think one second of my education is being wasted. Isn't that the old school way of thinking - why educate a woman who doesn't "work"?
We don't get an education just for a future job, we get an education to learn and better ourselves. Besides we are our kids first and most important teachers, shouldn't we have as many tools and skills at our disposal as possible? This topic gets me worked up since like you said, I'm forced to defend myself.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:19:32

Yes! You totally get it, Twingle Mommy! :)

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9/11/2013 10:31:41

Angela-- this is a great post. I am planning to do something similar in October. Every day my son comes home and asks me "what did you do all day" or "what did you do today". It's very hard for him (and adults I would imagine) that I am actually completely busy all day and my life is just as demanding as it was when I had a full time job. I think the bottom line for me (and it sounds like for you too) is that a life well lived takes a lot of work and effort, no matter where you spend your days--in an office or in a home.

Sending you love. This was a great post.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:22:55

Hi Kim! Thanks for the nice comment! I sometimes even forget all of the things I do in a day unless something triggers my mind. If I wrote down everything I did in a day....it would be a long list! Sometimes I wish I had a camera following me around all day to record everything I do in my waking hours!

It's frustrating to me that people question us SAHMs. I doubt those who work outside of the home are asked what they did all day!

And most certainly a life well lived takes A LOT of work and effort and everyone's choices (SAHM, work-at-home, work outside of the home) should be respected!

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9/11/2013 12:04:54

I can absolutely relate! I have a law degree and have always worked outside the home in some capacity, but traded full-time for part-time and contract work once they were born. But I miss working in an office environment. I miss the adult interaction and now that I'm not working outside the home, I really miss it! I love blogging, adore it actually, and I wouldn't trade raising my kids for anything!!! But once the kids are independent and both driving, I hope I can find a mix of my present freedom and an office environment -- the best of both worlds.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:25:38

Thanks for the comment, popcosmo! I miss the work environment at times, but I'd take the drama in my house over the drama in the office any day! It is important for stay at home parents to get out and interact with other grown-ups whether it be in a play group or small group. Sometimes I feel like I go days without talking in person to another grown-up except my husband!

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9/11/2013 12:18:26

I completely understand and commend you for what you are doing. Being a stay at home mom is a full time job. I have been one for 19 years now and I wouldn't have traded it for the highest paying job out there. Just like you, I commend those that do chose to work outside the home as well, that is a lot of hard work to do double duty.

We have six children and my husband has worked two jobs most of our married life so that I can stay at home with our children. I did not have a college degree before having children, but I did return to college about 6 years ago, when my youngest started school. I decided to stop for a few years in the middle of that, because my children needed more of me than what I could give while I was in school. I am getting ready to go back next semester.

I am grateful for the blessings that the Lord has given our family because of this path we are taking. We certainly have our challenges, but it's so worth it in the end.

Thank you for sharing!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:27:42

Thank you for sharing your story, Rachelle! Good for you guys for making sacrifices for the better of your family. And good for YOU for going to college! Hope this semester is going well for you!

May God continue to bless you and your family!

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9/11/2013 16:17:52

Yes, I can definitely relate. I have a BA and am a SAHM as well. I've had lots of comments and questions about this choice and it actually took me a year or so before I accepted the fact that this was what God wanted me to do and it had value. I am so glad I made this decision and wouldn't change it, and feel blessed that my husband has a job which allows me to do so. Thanks for sharing! Great post.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:29:40

Thanks, Abby! It's great that you realized God's plan for you and that it indeed has value!! I know that there are moms out there who want to stay home, but can't/feel they can't afford it. Glad that your family is in a place where you can stay home and raise your children!

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9/11/2013 16:27:28

Currently, I am a stay at home mom and I am already feeling pressured by a lot of people to go into the workforce. I want to stay at home and I do have (pretty much) a work from home business. Yet, sometimes business is slow and I get so bogged down that I don't have time. I get told so many times to get a job, but I really don't want to just leave my daughter anywhere. IDK. I also want to homeschool her, so I have to be at home.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:31:07

Quintasia,

Don't let others pressure you! As long as you are doing what you feel is best for your family, stick to it!

I didn't even get into what people think about the idea of us homeschooling! That's a whole other post! LOL. If that is where you are feeling led, then go for it!

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9/11/2013 18:34:02

There are many people who go to school for an education and do not stay in that particular filed of study, that does not mean that their education went to waste. Just as you have decided to be a stay at home mom, your education is not wasted, it is being focused on the most important ones in your life!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:31:39

Thanks for the encouragement, DeDe!

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9/11/2013 19:55:55

I stayed home with my three kids who are now 23, 21, and 17 and I wouldn't trade it for the world. Those years were awesome!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:32:22

You and your family were blessed, Laurie!

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9/12/2013 01:05:10

I quit my full time job as an accounting manager when my daughter was 18 months. I have only worked part time since. I have enjoyed every minute of it. My girls are both now in school full days, and I am looking to return to full time work. I know it won't be easy, but the extra income will help us tremendously - Disney Vacation, new vehicle that is really needed. I would do all of the penny pinching and sacrificing all over again though, if they were still at home.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:34:04

Annie,

That's great that you got to stay home with your children! Good luck returning back to work. It won't be easy, but it sounds like your family will benefit from it. Take care!

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9/12/2013 11:15:28

I just returned to work after 3 months of maternity leave and miss spending all that time with my little man. I loved being home with him and hope to be able to quit working full time next year. That is the only thing that is getting me through. Like you, I have a master's degree and will not for one minute think I am wasting it by staying at home.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:35:37

Amber,

I can not even imagine what it would feel like to go back to work after having a child. Good for you for doing it! I hope that you will be able to spend more time with your son next year. Enjoy every second because they grow so fast!

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Yes, I too am a Master's educated Stay-At-Home Mom. I also homeschool. It is hard and I always say, "who says I'm not using my education?? I am teaching my son and I 'counsel' (my degree) people all the time." I just don't get paid to do it. I used to feel like I had to justify why I'm not working. Nope, not anymore. It is our choice and I am fine with it. :-) Keep up the good work, Mama!!!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:37:04

Thanks for the encouragement, Sara! And good for you! We shouldn't be made to feel guilty for our choices! :)

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9/13/2013 15:03:06

Kudos. Being a full-time Mom and having the opportunity to love, nourish and teach your children is a blessing. I honor and respect all women who have been afforded this opportunity. In perusing your blog, I see a wealth of information that I can share with my son who is a single father raising a 4-yea-old daughter. Thank you so much for sharing.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:38:20

Thanks, SeasonedSistah2! I appreciate the kind words. Thank you for sharing my site with your son!

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9/13/2013 16:44:46

You're blessed to get to stay home full time with your kids, but I agree with you, it's not an easy job!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:39:08

Yes, Krissa! And I feel that with blessings comes responsibilities!

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9/13/2013 17:15:08

I believe each woman's choices about her life and family should be respected. What works for one might not work for another and we are all works in progress wanting the best for our families.

I worked but chose to cut my salary in half when my kids were of a certain age to take a job with very similar hours to their school hours and vacation time. It worked for me.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:41:00

Pam,

Isn't it funny though how society and even other moms judge one another? We all are just trying to do our best to raise our children, right?

Choosing to stay at home or be more available for our children tends to come with sacrifice, but it is so worth it! Glad you found something that works for you and your family.

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9/13/2013 19:03:42

I totally agree with this! I feel like people think I've wasted my education because I'm at home with my kids instead of using my engineering degree. When, in reality, I feel like it gave me lots of skills that I use every day!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:42:28

Thanks, Jennifer! I think people would "get it" if we explained it to them, but we shouldn't have to or feel like we have to explain our choices to them. Good for you!

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9/13/2013 20:16:37

I think everyone should do what's right for them at the time. I know a lot of people who have degrees in one thing but a career in another. Life takes many different turns and hands us many different opportunities and challenges. It's how we respond and adapt to them that counts, not what a piece of paper says!

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:43:13

That's so true, Carrie! Thanks for the comment.

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9/13/2013 21:17:04

I really enjoyed your post. I have a BA in Deaf Ed & Ele.ed. I'm now a SAHM; I home-educate my children. There is definitely a cloudy understanding of what working is. One day I was venting about issues on the "job". :). My husband asked if I still liked staying at home with the kids. Of course I do. I explained that I too need to talk about what happens during the work day just like he does.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:44:51

Thanks, Cindy! It surprises me that in this day and age that people still question what SAHM and homeschool families do. And I agree about us having to talk about our "work day" just like everyone else!

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9/13/2013 22:20:36

I say do what works for you and don't worry about naysayers! :) I can relate though, honestly. I am a working mom again now -- mostly by choice, partially because we bought a new house and I had some big plans -- but I've been a stay-at-home mom, too. Different seasons for different people, and sometimes, it's not just what is best for the fam but it's what you want anyway, you know? I think we all benefit when everyone's in the place that's best for them without worry about others..differences make the world go round! Enjoy your kids! (They grow too fast!)

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:47:04

Thanks, Dee! It is true that if a mother's heart isn't into staying home, it will affect the children. It is a decision that has to be made with your husband and looks at the needs of everyone in the family.

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9/14/2013 08:35:49

I was a stay at home mom for 2 years after my son was born. It was not my choice, I lost my job. I have a 10 year difference between my children so I was not at home a lot. At one time I posed the question...deifne "stay at home mom". It is a thankless job from people who dont know or have not been in the position. It does feel like we justify things. Though I did not make the choice I dont regret being home with my son. My regret is I did not do more for him.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:49:32

Elizabeth,

Sorry that you lost your job, but glad you enjoyed the extra time with your son. God had a plan for your life even though it wasn't what you may have chosen.

I wouldn't say a SAHM is a thankless job even though it can feel like that sometimes. My girls are very appreciative of what I do for them, as is my husband. I just think that they aren't aware of how much I do for them. :)

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9/14/2013 12:18:59

My husband is a SAHD so I cannot completely relate, but get where you are coming from. I have a Master's in El Ed, too; however, I work in IT for a grocery retailer. I get asked when I'll teach again, too. Some days, I wish I was a SAHM, but know I "couldn't" do it as amazingly as my husband does.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:52:28

Becky,

That's awesome about your husband! A big high-five to him! I know that wouldn't work for everyone!

I'm sure anyone that is not in their "chosen" field gets questions about their choices. We should just be glad that people are working and contributing to their families!

Glad that your family has found out what works best for you all!

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9/14/2013 12:41:43

Right with you on this! SAHM here as well and loving it! I cannot imagine allowing someone else the privilege of seeing my duaghter learn all these new things.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:53:46

I hear ya, Leah! People think it's funny because I used to work at a preschool taking care of other people's children. I loved my job, but I knew it wasn't what I wanted for my children.

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9/14/2013 22:39:59

I can relate to this. I just had my second child and I don't miss working at all but I do miss the people. I don't think I'm wasting my college degree by being home. If anything I am using the skills I learned in college even more.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:55:08

Congrats on your second child, Sara! Happy for you that you are enjoying staying at home. It's hard when they are little, but try to connect with a mom's group so you can still have that grown-up interaction you desire!

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9/15/2013 11:33:40

You are doing the most important job in the world, raising children. I think many mothers would choose to do this if finances would allow.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:56:56

Thanks, Peg! I used to think that every mother would want to stay home with her child if the finances allowed, but I have learned that not every woman is SAHM material or wants to be.

Thankful that I have been given the opportunity to do so though!

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9/15/2013 14:56:15

Why, oh, why are we still judging women for their personal and family choices? We do not seem to do this to men. I know many a man who does not work in the field for which he got a college degree. Does not mean he "wasted" his education, also? Raising children is an occupation, and one that needs to be done well. I would think that your education would be a great help in accomplishing this. It would be so nice if everyone could just do what they choose to do for themselves and their families without being judged by outsiders.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 14:59:42

Thanks, Grandma Loy! It seems to be more acceptable (yet people are still judged) to be working in a field other than your chosen degree than it is for moms/dads to stay at home.

While we hear how important the job of raising children is, the support is not always there!

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9/15/2013 16:44:54

I raised five children and stayed home with them as much as I could. It was the most rewarding, challenging, growing and maturing time in my life. You will never be sorry for the time you spend pouring into your children. They will grow up knowing how important you thought it was to be with them and they will know just how much they were loved.

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 15:00:33

That's great, Holly! Thanks for the kind words. :)

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9/15/2013 18:02:48

I became a SAHM by accident - my job relocated right before I had my first child. To be honest, it was a huge shock for me - I never wanted to be a SAHM. But, I believe in fate, and that's what was in the cards for me. When my kids went to school, I picked up a part-time job, and now I'm very happy to have one foot in and one foot out. It all comes down to what works for you and your family. :)

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The Master's Daughter
10/16/2013 15:03:01

Denine,

I believe God has great plans for each of us and it sounds like He wanted you home with your children. :) So glad that you have found a balance that works for you and your family.

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9/15/2013 21:12:13

Sometimes I wonder if I'll be wasting my degree as well if I become a sahm. I honestly want to become a sahm when I have kids.

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I can very much relate. I have a Bachelors in Athletic Training. I was nationally certified, and let it drop because of the cost. I have NO intentions of ever doing that job again. 60+ hours a week was insane! the first child was raised by babysitters--it was horrible. By the time #2 came along, we were financially OK enough to stay home. We still struggle with money. But I know it's best that my children know me. We will never take a vacation as a family to Disney or Cancun, but we have a good life.

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9/16/2013 13:10:16

I am also a SAHM and although I'd love to become a nurse later in life, I am SO happy to be home now. It is so hard and there are days I would pay someone to be able to go to work (ha!), I know that I am so blessed to be the one raising and teaching my children.

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9/17/2013 08:27:28

Good point. Thanks for sharing this. It doesn't just apply to moms, but anyone who makes a counter-cultural decision! Our culture expects us to be a certain way and when we follow Christ to do something different, it can make people very uncomfortable.

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9/17/2013 12:35:42

Good for you! I agree. We need to be content where we are and the season we are growing in continually. Keeping our focus of why we are working our stay at home jobs. Believing the truth that this it is the best thing for our situation and not to compare our lives with others.

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9/17/2013 20:57:42

I love that you are enjoying your experience at home with your children. I work on weekends and even though I miss out on a lot of events I wouldn't change it for anything- well until I can make enough money not to work as a waitress. These times with our kids are precious and will never happen again so enjoy.

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9/18/2013 08:21:55

I only have an associate degree, but I stay at home with my kids. I also homeschool them. I provide childcare in my home for 2 little ones to help with the bills. It works for us for right now :) I love being able to be at home with my kids and earn a little extra money too.

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9/18/2013 09:57:54

No one should ever have to defend their choices as to what they want to do and feel is best for their family. There is an entire spectrum of opinion out there and it's best to ignore it and go with your heart.

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9/18/2013 10:54:58

I, too, have a masters degree and stay home (and homeschool) my children. I will say that I have adjusted my thoughts on whether a college degree is really necessary in most instances. I know that what I really gained my my college experience-- learning and experiences-- could have been gained through other means which wouldn't have piled on so much debt for me!
--Gena

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9/18/2013 12:13:32

I have a bachelor's degree and used to work in PR and as a magazine editor. While I loved my jobs, I never thought twice about staying home once they were born. I love being able to volunteer in their classrooms and be home when they get off the bus. Maybe some day I'll go back to work, but for now, I love staying at home.

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9/18/2013 23:46:49

Last year I resigned from my position as a financial analyst to stay at home. My kids are much older and everyone thought I was nuts (they still do), but it was best for my family. To each their own, you have to do what is best for you!
<a href="http://www.imjustsayindamn.com/">Jae Mac @ I'm Just Sayin'...(Damn!)</a>

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9/19/2013 01:53:30

We forget to not judge others when we do not know their circumstance and the concept of freedom of choice! Whatever decision a mother and father makes is ultimately up to them as long as they are building wonderful memories that the family can cherish in years to come.
http://www.lush-fab-glam.com

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9/20/2013 16:39:50

I am just this year going back to work after being a Stay at home Mom for 9 years. I am so glad that I choose to be a SAHM I would have regretted the decision to work while my kids were so little. I am only working half time so I am still home when they leave for school and home when they get off the bus. This is perfect for me and I'm so glad I get to have time with my boys! And though I don't have a masters, I do have one of those expensive pieces of paper too!

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9/24/2013 16:39:09

Being a stay at home mom can be tough but it's such a blessing! I love being able to watch my kids learn & grow, and to teach them about our Savior & about our life. I too am grateful that we have been able to make it work with just one income because I don't miss work, but I would miss my children if I had to go back to work.

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